Personal traits, communication skills for effective pastoral care

If as pastoral care personnel we are to be compassionate companions of the sick, we should cultivate a number of personal characteristics and communication skills that will make our ministry most effective. By the same token, certain common characteristics and communication styles should be eschewed because they make our ministry ineffective. Being comfortable with feelings--our own as well as others'--helps patients feel free to share their emotions and troubles. Similarly, being aware of--and accepting--our personal identity is requisite to accepting and affirming others. Such negative personal traits as a poor self-image and a high need for control, on the other hand, can keep interactions with patients superficial. Communication styles--positive and negative--flow from personality traits, and it is important to work on both communication and personality at the same time. The pastoral care person should develop skills in attending, "door-opening," and responding, even as he or she strives to eliminate such detrimental practices as "sending solutions," evaluating the other person, and reassuring the person prematurely.