[How physicians experience their illness. The vulnerable healer]

The reports of sick physicians presented here, cover a wide range of suffering, perception of illness, the struggle to regain health, and efforts to come to terms with fate. In many cases, writing serves as a means of more readily coping with relevant problems, but also of helping others. In his own personal experience of the "dark side" of modern high-performance medicine, many a doctor comes to recognize what is lacking from comprehensive care. Such a lack is often balanced by family, friends, self-help groups, but also by the application of alternative methods and the search for spiritual answers. Acceptance of his role as patient is initially difficult for the physician, and he frequently gets little help from his medical care-provider who may himself be uncertain and prejudiced. Those treating sick physicians should be better informed about the psychological processes of coping with illness, and should learn to handle emotional upsets with patience. More than any other group of patients, sick physicians wish to have a say in the diagnostic and therapeutic processes. As a result of this, a number of sick physicians discover a new type of medicine, and become reformers of their own specialty, while others experience a higher quality of life after recovering from their illness.