Anorexia, masochism, self-mutilation, and autoerotism: the spider mother

In summary, both self-mutilators and eating-disordered individuals come from dysfunctional homes with a very controlling mother and usually absent father. They often have a history of trauma. They are depressed and obsessive, attached to their mothers, who discourage attempts at emancipation. The symptoms serve the purpose of keeping them as little girls with negative feelings toward menstruation, sexual maturity, development, and femininity in general. These symptoms comprise self-destructive behavior in the service of removing sexual thoughts, temptation, and activities. Favazza (1987) included both eating disorders and self mutilation in his "deliberate self-harm syndrome." The symptoms, whether they be anorexic, bulimic, or a form of self-mutilation are seen as "autoerotic in nature and a substitute for normal masturbation" (Hull & Lane, 1988). Eating disorders and delicate self-mutilation are said to have "a cathartic, self-purifying, function in that they modulate states of anxiety, sexual tension, anger or dissociated emptiness, and they bring about a tremendous quasi-physical sense of relief" (Cross, 1993, p. 50). These patients' use of substitutes prevents maturation and growth as women, causing regression to pregenital phases with the use of pregenital defenses, and the demise of the demands of puberty and mature sexuality.