Being in a lived retreat--embodied meaning of alleviated suffering

Meanings of alleviated suffering in persons living with life-threatening cancer are explored in this life-world phenomenologic study. In repeated conversations, 16 patients with cancer who were receiving palliative care shared their embodied experiences in personal narratives. When interpreting the narratives, the following meanings of experiencing alleviation of suffering were disclosed: an endurable body being independent and feeling at home, feelings of connectedness, taking a long view of the suffering, being lifted out of the suffering, and an inner peace. Movements that were found in alleviation were dampening the suffering, arousing a zest for life, and focusing on both the present and the patient's dignity. As an interpreted whole, alleviation of suffering was found to be an embodied experience of "being in a lived retreat." This is a symbolic place owned by the person and is experienced in either the company of others or solitude. This lived retreat can provide a feeling of being at home, creating peace, rest, confidence, and breathing space in the person's suffering. It means coping with the altered lived body and feeling dignified. This is a personal experience that is both intersubjectively created and dependent. The importance of openness and responsibility in palliative care is emphasized in the findings and the notion of control of suffering in palliative care is accordingly rejected.