You are so beautiful... to me: seeing beyond biases and achieving accuracy in romantic relationships

Do romantic partners see each other realistically, or do they have overly positive perceptions of each other? Research has shown that realism and positivity co-exist in romantic partners' perceptions (Boyes & Fletcher, 2007). The current study takes a novel approach to explaining this seemingly paradoxical effect when it comes to physical attractiveness--a highly evaluative trait that is especially relevant to romantic relationships. Specifically, we argue that people are aware that others do not see their partners as positively as they do. Using both mean differences and correlational approaches, we test the hypothesis that despite their own biased and idiosyncratic perceptions, people have 2 types of partner-knowledge: insight into how their partners see themselves (i.e., identity accuracy) and insight into how others see their partners (i.e., reputation accuracy). Our results suggest that romantic partners have some awareness of each other's identity and reputation for physical attractiveness, supporting theories that couple members' perceptions are driven by motives to fulfill both esteem- and epistemic-related needs (i.e., to see their partners positively and realistically).