Mothers of very low birthweight babies: who supports them?

Delivery of a very low birthweight (VLBW) baby usually precipitates a crisis in the lives of a family, and the mother's adequacy and competence are challenged. To whom does she turn for support? Twenty-one mothers of singleton VLBW babies were interviewed on six occasions from 1 week after the birth to 3 months after the baby's discharge from hospital. At each interview they were asked whom they had found most supportive. Whilst partners were generally supportive, other relatives seemed to have difficulty knowing how to help. There was a rallying to the mother's aid during the initial crisis period after the birth and again immediately after the baby's discharge home but few sustained this effort during the chronic stages when the mother was tired, depressed and anxious. Though hospital staff were considered supportive for the most part, there were areas for improvement in their ability to listen empathically to the mother's own perceptions of events and behaviours which were at great variance to their own. Health visitors appeared to have real difficulties. They demonstrated a marked lack of knowledge and understanding and they were considered very unsupportive by many mothers.