Adult Children's Responses to Parent "Stubbornness"

People cope with relationship tensions in different ways. One such tension that is frequently reported is how adult children respond to conflicts with their aging parents when they see their parents as insisting, resisting, or persisting in their behaviors-acting in ways commonly attributed to stubbornness.

Middle-aged adults (N = 383) completed measures regarding their parents' stubbornness, their responses to that stubbornness, depressive symptoms, positive and negative relationship quality, and support they provide their parents. Multiple regression and multilevel models were utilized to examine whether middle-aged offspring's responses to perceived parent stubbornness were associated with the offspring's reported depressive symptoms, positive and negative relationship quality, and provision of support.

Adult children most frequently endorsed responding to parents' "stubborn" behaviors by "just letting their requests go." Results revealed associations of adult children's response strategies with their reports of depressive symptoms (more letting go), positive relationship quality (less letting go and more reasoning), negative relationship quality (more arguing, more rewording their request, and less reasoning), and the amount of support they provide to their parents (more arguing, more reasoning, and more waiting to address the concern another day).

Adult children's responses to perceived parent stubbornness are linked to individual and relationship functioning, as well as the support the children provide. Interventions to develop adaptive responses when there are differences in goals may prove useful for families.