Emerging Ideas. A ripple effect: Does I-sharing with a stranger promote compromise in cohabiting couples?

Living together harmoniously requires compromise. Research on the psychological factors that promote compromise frequently focuses on individual differences and interpersonal environment. The current research takes a different approach by asking what role I-sharing (i.e., the feeling that others share the same in-the-moment, subjective experience as oneself) plays in the success of a cohabiting couple's compromise efforts.

Drawing from work on the prosocial outcomes associated with I-sharing, we asked whether I-sharing with a stranger enhances couples' ability to compromise.

Both members of a cohabiting couple privately reported the percentage of time they spend on household tasks (the Division of Household Labor inventory [DHL]) before undergoing a manipulation in which they either did or did not have an I-sharing experience with a stranger. Participants then completed the DHL again, this time working together with their cohabiting partner to reach a consensus in their responses. Finally, participants had another chance to complete the DHL in private, receiving the instruction to respond with their true beliefs.

When relationship partners worked together to complete the DHL at the second reporting, their responses were identical. At the third (private) DHL reporting, consistent with prediction, couples assigned to the I-share condition showed more agreement with their partner than couples assigned to the No I-share condition.

This finding suggests that the prosociality generated by I-sharing can promote compromise in cohabiting couples.

I-sharing holds promise as a therapeutic tool to promote compromise in treatment-seeking families and couples.