Double life of the pill: towards a cabaret methodology for contraceptive research

In this article, I propose cabaret methodology as a valuable paradigm for capturing experiences of hormonal contraception in all their complexity. I sought a playful, self-aware and ethically rigorous practice to explore and express the lived experiences of people who use hormonal contraception, including myself. I have spent the past 4 years developing the solo cabaret piece Side FX, which functions as a repository of contraceptive experiences and histories, and queers the clinical encounter through comedic audience participation.The pill is variously configured as an agent of liberation or oppression, a liberal feminist victory or a white feminist weapon. Curiously for such a contentious technology, it is rarely visible in theatre, film or television. Taking the pill is an action so mundane that it rarely ever merits dramatic representation. It is the antithesis of drama done to prevent a sudden and drastic change (pregnancy, motherhood, abortion), yet drastic changes are often felt by the pill-taker, dramatically complicated by their ambiguity. Working within a tradition of feminist health activism, I argue for the importance of maintaining multiplicity while analysing discourse around the pill.Cabaret presents itself as a forum through which to explore, express and trouble the experiences under consideration; a series of turns, connected thematically, hosted by a mercurial, dominant presence, revelling in rug-pulling, sophisticated comedy and contradictions. The application of cabaret to research can allow multiplicity and ambiguity to stand without rejecting the paradigms of research altogether. I argue that these multiple narratives offer a productive ambiguity that reflects how varied individual experiences of hormonal contraception are.