Before Desire: Childhood Gender Nonconformity and Minority Stress Among Young Gay Men in Spain

Childhood gender nonconformity (CGN) is a well-established developmental correlate of adult sexual orientation, yet evidence from Southern Europe remains scarce. This article examines how young gay men in Spain recall early gender-atypical preferences and embodied practices, and the social responses these elicited before the emergence of sexual desire or identity labels. Drawing on sixteen in-depth biographical interviews analyzed through an inductive thematic approach, the study explores and documents recurring forms of childhood gender nonconformity, including preference for girls as companions, avoidance of masculine-coded games such as football, bodily and vocal styles that depart from masculine norms, and interest in toys and feminized domestic activities. Participants consistently described an early awareness of being "different," accompanied by teasing, exclusion, or bullying from peers, teachers, and some family members. The findings suggest that minority stress among many gay men begins through the policing of gender expression before sexual self-recognition. The article also highlights the cultural specificity of childhood gender regulation in Spain, where expanding acceptance of homosexuality coexists with persistent norms of hegemonic masculinity. None of the participants described sustained discomfort with their male gender identity, underscoring the importance of distinguishing analytically between gender expression, gender identity, and sexual orientation.