The Impact of "Harmful Behaviours" on Parents of Autistic Children

In existing literature, an Autistic child's "externalising behaviour" (e.g., aggression, defiance) is often associated with poor parental mental health outcomes. Yet few studies have considered the extent and nature of the impact of a child's harmful behaviours (physical harm to self, others, and property) on parents qualitatively. Here, we examined how Autistic and non-autistic parents conceptualise their Autistic children's harmful behaviours, and the impact of such behaviours on parents. We analysed 39 Autistic and non-autistic parent interviews using reflexive thematic analysis, from which we identified four themes. Theme 1 encompassed parents' experiences of their children's harmful behaviours. Theme 2 captured parents' explanations for their children's harmful behaviours, which they understood as indicating intense distress. In Theme 3, parents reflected on their responses to periods of crisis, during which they prioritised safety but acknowledged a systemic lack of support hindered their efforts. Finally, Theme 4 describes the detrimental impacts on parent mental health, including feelings of helplessness, grief, guilt, and fear for the future. We show that it is imperative to more openly discuss child harmful behaviours in neuroaffirming ways, to develop responsive and appropriate parental and familial supports, which acknowledge the role of guilt and trauma in parental mental health.Lay AbstractLots of research suggests that an Autistic child's so-called "externalising behaviour" (like aggression or defiance) has a negative impact on that child's parents' mental health. But, so far, very few studies have talked directly to parents about why and how they experience distress because of their child's externalising behaviours. In this study, we interviewed 39 Autistic and non-Autistic parents of Autistic children, to better understand their experiences of specific externalising behaviours. For this study, we were particularly interested in children's "harmful behaviours," which we defined as violence towards self, others, and/or property. We wanted parents to tell us in their own words what their experiences of such harmful behaviours were, how they understood these periods of crisis, what they did to respond to their children's harmful behaviours, and what they felt about the behaviours. When we analysed parents' responses, we came up with four main ideas or "themes." Parents saw harmful behaviours as a combination of child self-harm, suicidal behaviour, and physical violence to their parents, siblings, and property (Theme 1). But parents did not necessarily blame their child, instead understanding that their child's behaviour was likely an indication of intense or extreme distress or dysregulation (Theme 2). Parents wanted to keep their whole family safe, but they found they had limited options to do this, and they felt there was little or no support to help them during crises (Theme 3). Unfortunately, parents expressed lots of different emotions, like helplessness, grief, guilt, and fear, as a result of their child's harmful behaviours (Theme 4). We need to understand better what is happening in families, how they are responding, and what support they need to cope so that we can help families who are experiencing these kinds of crises. This article addresses these questions.