Emotion regulation in couples' conflict memories: A dyadic examination of relationship quality

Although conflicts in a romantic relationship are known to impact its quality, how individuals keep emotionally regulating the memory of these conflicts could also be associated with both partners' relationship quality. The present study investigated whether the emotion regulation strategies used during recall of a couple conflict memory were differentially associated with the perceived relationship quality of both partners. A total of 218 participants (109 couples) reported their general emotion regulation strategies and perception of relationship quality. Each participant subsequently described a specific conflict memory within the relationship, and judges independently rated the intensity of the reported conflict. Participants also reported the emotion regulation strategy they still used when recalling the conflict. Emotion regulation strategies involved either actively engaging with negative emotions, accepting them, and deriving meaning from the experience (i.e., integrative emotion regulation) or difficulty in adequately managing the negative emotions when recalling the conflict, leading to an overwhelming experience (i.e., dysregulation). A multilevel model revealed that integrative regulation during retrieval of conflict memories was positively associated with self-perceived relationship quality. In contrast, dysregulation during retrieval of conflict memories was negatively associated with both partners' perceived relationship quality. Importantly, these results remained significant even after accounting for how people generally regulate their emotions in daily life, as well as the intensity of the conflict. Our findings suggest that the emotion regulation used when retrieving a conflict memory may modulate each partner's perceived relationship quality. (PsycInfo Database Record (c) 2026 APA, all rights reserved).