Motherhood, the "blank slate," and the language of surrogacy

Women who gestate and give birth to infants or who provide oocytes in surrogacy arrangements are most often described as "surrogates," "gestational carriers," or "donors," rather than mothers. This terminology is used not only by the women themselves but also by those wishing to become parents via surrogacy and by those who profit from surrogacy. Caregiving parents predominantly discourage their children from using language that ascribes parenthood to those who gestated and gave birth to them or provided the gametes for their conception. In rationalising this linguistic choice, the importance of gestation, birth, and genetics is downplayed. This perspective paper discusses the significance of genetic and gestational motherhood for children born via surrogacy. In doing this, it explores the foetal and neonatal experiences of gestational motherhood. Insights from adoption and donor conception are also presented, highlighting the limitations and harms of treating infants as "blank slates." In addition, the paper reviews research on the language used by individuals born via surrogacy and donor conception to describe the women who gestated and gave birth to them or those who provided the gametes for their conception. It is concluded that it is beneficial for children for the language of surrogacy to recognise the multiplicity of their mothers.