In search of a loving father

With the help of clinical material obtained from two male patients in therapy at the same time, the concept of the loving father is examined. Both patients presented with a fear of being homosexual. It gradually became clear during the therapy that both of them were searching for a loving father. It is suggested that the role of the loving father is the capacity to accept that it is the baby's right to bring to him all its needs, wishes, fantasies and feelings but not to expect the baby to deal with his own mainly unconscious needs, wishes, fantasies and feelings that are inappropriate to that relationship. It is further suggested that this is one of the qualities possessed by the good-enough pre-oedipal father.