Parenting My Transgender Child: From Loss to Acceptance

At age 11, my child Neo told me he was a boy and not a girl, as assigned at birth. Despite my training as a child and adolescent psychiatrist, I struggled to accept his declaration and had to learn how to best support him. He was never a typical girl, but when he decided he was transgender, my husband and I navigated the adjustment to new pronouns, a name change, the transition at school, and telling friends and family. Seeing Neo's sadness and despondency when he was not accepted sparked me to educate myself about medical options for transgender individuals and other ways to be gender affirming. Although I initially felt a sense of loss and hurt about Neo being transgender, these feelings changed to acceptance and pride as I watched Neo change and grow. Neo taught me to challenge societal dichotomies and taught me about how physicians in particular can support families with gender-creative children.